It is 7:10 AM and I am typing on my computer. Yesterday I didn't even have a chance to check my e-mail. Rock is still asleep in his crib. Yes, his crib. The fact that he is in his crib is a miracle in itself, but the fact that he is still asleep at 7:10 AM (without the comfort of an early morning feed) is just, well, unbelievable. I wish I could say that he had slept through the entire night, but that would be beyond unbelievable. Besides, I probably would have woken him up checking for a pulse if he had made it past 3:30 AM without his usual late night awakenings. Despite the not sleeping through the entire night thing, I am so proud of his crib-time and sleeping accomplishments!

Rock is 4-1/2 months old and until now he usually would wake multiple times in the night and then get up at between 5 AM and 6:30 AM. In fact, he used to sleep right in-between his Daddy and me. I know that this arrangement works for many people, but at between 3-1/2 and 4 months I started to notice he was waking up more often in the night. He would wake up every time either his Daddy or I would shift as well as when he needed to eat. Also, at 3-1/2 months he began move around more, and I started to worry about him rolling off the bed after I got up in the morning. So, I decided it was time to transition to the crib. I will not even begin to try to describe the horrors of this transition phase. I do not believe in leaving a baby to cry-it-out, but after going through this ordeal (which I am still actually working through) I am not going to knock those who do use this method (within reason of course). I am sure some babies take to their cribs so easily that there are mothers out there wondering what the big deal is, but if you have ever had a baby that NEEDS you to hold him/nurse him/rock him and stay with him in order to sleep then you surely feel my pain.

So now at half past 7 with my baby monitor in hand I feel that my son has truly accomplished something great, and I am a proud mother. So why is it that I feel the need to scoop him up and take him back to my bed? Is it my natural instinct kicking in telling me that I have separated my family unit before it is time? Or, is it my overprotective motherly urge trying to squelch the independence that my son has and will continue to gain? Hmmmmm…..
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My son gave me a silver heart-shaped necklace with the word Mom scrolled across the front for my first Mother's Day present. It is beautiful. Most days I wear it as a proud badge of motherhood signifying to myself and to others that I have been given the most precious gift that one can be given in this life – a child. Today I am wearing it as an excuse. I am a mom - that is why my shirt has a spit-up stain on the shoulder and my hair was brushed back wet into a chignon and I am standing in the Dillard’s restroom wiping baby poo off of my child’s back and out of his car seat/stroller travel system. Yuck! I am not complaining. Well, I guess I am sort of complaining, but I am mostly thinking about the label – Mom. We all have a mom – you just don’t get to be here without one. The label is so common that it is easy to overlook the magnitude of the job that this label entails. True, not all moms are good moms – some are flat out terrible – but I think most women who own this label try to do the very best for their children. I have only owned the title for 4 ½ months and although I remain overwhelmed by the responsibility I can’t imagine not giving it my all every day. I am not saying anything new or profound here, but on the days that I wear my label as an excuse I like to remind myself that the title is a gift and good moms never forget this blessing.

Thank goodness my son only eats breast milk or that poo situation could have been a lot worse!

 
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My First Post 06/01/2010
 
Hmmm.... what to write.... Today I start my Super Suburban Mom blogging adventure. I am too tired to appreciate it. After I purchased my site I became inundated with mommy tasks and wifey tasks and now - at 9:22 pm - it is way past my bedtime. I've got 12:30, 2:30, 4:30, and 5:30 feedings - yawn- must go to bed.... 
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